Chaostic Taber-Nickel of Discordia[edit | edit source]
The Chaostic Taber-Nickel of Discordia is the successor organization to the House of Apostles of Eris, the Secret Cabal of Shhhhh! headed by Pope St. Ben-Hur Sturgeon.
The Beginning[edit | edit source]
In the distant past, sometime after the last coherant thought but quite before the next or proximate coherant thought, Pope Ben, the Sainted Sturgeon of Hur found himself standing upon an unfamiliar street corner. He, like many prelates of his time, had lost time, place and memory in what has is now called the Intermittent Dispersian Complex and Hodge Podge Confluence . Bemused, confused, tired and hungry, he quickly took inventory. Physical Inventory: 1 dirty shirt, 1 ripped pair of paints, 2 socks (with holes), 1 shoe, 1 wallet with no money, 1 massive headache, blurry vision and a dry taste in his mouth. Spiritual Inventory: Confused, his brain lightly touched by the 12 lb Mallet of Misunderstanding of the Lady, vague memories of grey, even vaguer people who were his, his, his flock by Goddess! He was the Sainted Pope of the the House of Apostles of Eris. But where were they now? Physical Inventory: 1 dirty shirt, 1 ripped pair of paints, 2 socks (with holes), 1 shoe, 1 wallet with no money, 1 massive headache, blurry vision and a dry taste in his mouth and no Apostles. And no memory of their names. And not quite sure that the Secret Cabal of Shhhhh! was secret because it was secret or if it was because he could not remember its real name. OMGss! Had the years been a sham? Shhhhh! His head hurts.
Confusion, Despair and Pineal Consultation[edit | edit source]
Still confused, beginning to feel the first stirrings of fear and despair, St. Benny took a deep cleansing breath. After his coughing fit was over, he consulted his pineal gland. He meditated, visualized, theorized, prayed and implored the Gateway to Her. His pineal gland throbbed, pulsated and spasmed. His eyes crossed, his tongue hung low as he moved it to and fro, his hair stood on end, IT WAS HAPPENING.....REVELATION! His legs crossed in his ecstatic gyrations. He fell, smacked his chin and lay full upon the ground. All images became hazy, and indistinct save one.....
Discovery of Strange Change[edit | edit source]
There at the end of his nose, lay a nickel. He realized he was much like this nickel, lost, alone in the world. But But But this nickel was Found! No longer alone in the world, this nickel was found by the ever groping hand of Eris. This was strange. This was Strange Change. He and the nickel were the Strange Change of Eris, the rattling sound of metal lost in the deep corners of a pocket or purse or can. He and it were Saved. They were the Saved Strange Change of Eris. Save your Strange Change! From lost to found, St. B. Hur the Pontifical Sturgeon advanced 3 squares forward on the great boardgame of Spiritual Growth. He was Eris's Nickel. He was her Saved Strange Change. He, like her, would devote his life, well, at least a couple of hours a day looking to Save the Change! Who needed Apostles, whose names he could not remember? Who needed a house, whose address he just could not pull into memory? Who wanted the lame postscript of Secret Cabal of Shhhhh!, when it probably was built upon a lie, or brain damage?
Founding of the Chaostic Taber-Nickel of Discordia[edit | edit source]
Within a short time, as measured by redwoods and big, giant sea turtles, Pope St. Ben-Hur Sturgeon found the Chaostic Taber-Nickel of Discordia. Finding all manner of Strange Change, membership numbers swelled. Save Enough Nickels of Eris, and You Can Buy Stuff! A place of learning, study, contemplation and association of Strange Things, new inroads into the Linguistic Synergies between totally random people, places and things flourished. Gone were the fancy titles which had set apart the Nickels, gone were the pre-conceived notions of acceptable and unacceptable, a true Brother/Sister/Mother/Fatherhood of Holy Stuff and Holy Cows began to blossom in what he envisioned as a new Age of Wonder.
Zoning Problems[edit | edit source]
Just as Pope No More but still St. Ben-Hur Sturgeon and his BroSisMoFas reached ever closer to Absolute Truths and Outright Lies, IT CAME. The missive looked simple enough, a plain manila envelope with a concisely written letter. It was a Notice of Public Hearing regards to the matter of the Zoning of the Chaostic Taber-Nickel of Discordia. It appeared that a Variance had been filed with the DCC. The road rolls ever on and the taber-nickel was located smack dab in the middle of a proposed Holy Overpass.