Eye Day falls on the 73rd day of each season.
Celebration[edit | edit source]
Eye Day is celebrated by playing Discordian Games, meditating on the Season just passed, getting ripped off your tits, and making Terrible Mistakes in nightclubs. Make sure you carry at least 5 inches of strong, weight-bearing cord, a packet of chewing gum, a spare pair of undergarments, 144 condoms, the phone number of the local branch of the Scientologists, a small sheet of bubble wrap, and a poem by Emily Dickinson with you at all times.
Beware, also, the Dreaded Illuminati on Eye Days. Our ancient foes stole Eye Day from us as a time to commit particularly heinous and bloodthirsty acts upon any Discordian they could capture. Make sure your membership paperwork in the AISB is up-to-date and be ready to produce it on demand.
In addition, to ensure the readiness of fellow Discordians, pretend to be an inspection agent with the AISB and make surprise checks on their membership paperwork. Many Discordians are lax on this front -- feel free to reinforce this lesson using all the Großmütterlich Gefalligkeit at your disposal. Do not hold back--they may be in pain today, but they'll thank you tomorrow.