Changes: List of chicks and dicks Zeus has banged

Revision as of 18:58, 19 June 2015

According to classical sources

Divine chicks he knocked up

Aege (his nurse maid)--son Aegipan aka Pan
Anake/Thetis (his great aunt)--three daughters/nieces, the Moirai (Fates): Atropos, Clotho, Lachesis,
Aphrodite (his daughter)--daughter/granddaughter Tyche (father might have been Hermes)
Demeter (his sister)--daughter/niece Persephone
Dione (his wife, possibly also himself)--daughter Aphrodite
Eos (his mistress, Selene's sister)--daughter Carae
Eris (his daughter)--daughter/granddaughter Limos
Euroynome (his wife)--daughters the Graces Aglaea, Euphrosyne, Thalia
Gaia (his grandmother)--son/great grandson King Manes
Hera (his sister and wife)--sons/nephews and daughters/nieces Ares, Eileithyia, Eris, Hebe, Hephaestus, Angelos
Leto (his mistress)--son Apollo and daughter Artemis
Maia (his mistress)--son Hermes
Mnemosyne (his aunt)--daughters/nieces Aoide, Melete, Mneme (original three muses) and Calliope, Clio, Euterpe, Erato, Melpomene, Polyhymnia, Terpsichore, Thalia, Urania (later nine muses)
Nemesis (his cousin)--daughter Helen of Troy
Persephone (his daughter)--daughter/granddaughter Melinoe and son/grandson Zagreus
Selene (his mistress, Eos' sister)--daughters Ersa and Pandia, son Nemean lion
Thalia (his granddaughter)--son/great-grandson Palici
Themis (his aunt)--daughters/nieces Astraea, nymphs of Eridanos, Nemesis, Horae

Semi-Divine or mortal chicks he knocked up

Aegina (goat nymph)
Alcmene (wife of Amphitryon)
Antiope (river god daughter and Zeus' rape victim)
Anaxita (moth?)
Asterope aka Oceanid (wife of Endymion?)
Callisto (nymph changed to a bear)
Calyce (wife and/or mother of Aethlius)
Callirhoe (his niece)
Carme (Cretan spirit, daughter of Cassiopeia)
Cassiopeia (wife of King Phoenix)
Chaldene (a nymph)
Danaë (consort of Polydectes)
Dia (wife of Ixion)
Elara (princess, adulterous affair)
Electra (wife of Corythus)
Europa (Phoencian noble, raped by Zeus as a bull)
Eurymedousa (ant queen, raped by Zeus as an ant)
Euryodeia (immortal)
Io (his wife sister Hera's priestess, a young cow)

Divine dicks

Ganymede, divine youth from Troy

According to modern sources

You know, back in the old days, I really had a way with the ladies. Back then, if I wanted to pick up a woman, all I had to do was approach her in my aspect as a bull or swan, and she'd be all mine, helpless to resist. The move was pure gold. It never failed—even on goddesses.

But these modern women, that's a whole other story. For some reason, they just don't go for it at all.

--Zeus quoted in Today's Women Don't Like It When You Come To Them As A Bull Or Swan

Goldie Bear
Bonnie (mother of Reverend Loveshade)
The 1958-59 Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders
Laurie Flynt
Hummer Hefner
Pope Hilde (Unified Catholic Church pope)
Eldwin Nightowl's grandmother
The Sacred Chao
Gypsie Skripto (Discordian artist and interviewer)
Miley Spears (Discordian American Princess)
Black Widow

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 ==According to modern sources==
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+<!-- BE VERY CAREFUL HERE. Do not libel or slander. List only those who are fictional characters or those who gave permission to be included in a list such as this, or possibly public figures who brag about having sex with so many people--including men--that they can't remember them all. -->
 :You know, back in the old days, I really had a way with the ladies. Back then, if I wanted to pick up a woman, all I had to do was approach her in my aspect as a bull or swan, and she'd be all mine, helpless to resist. The move was pure gold. It never failed—even on goddesses.