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Really Real Discordians (For Realness) exist to arrive on the scene, whatever the scene may be, and inform everyone there that they're Doin' It Wrong. Really Real Discordians are often, but not always, Pinealists or Hate Rant Discordians, and their favorite activity is not so much to be thought-provoking as to be Right, thereby making all of the Bad Discordians Wrong. They will typically point out various Discordian projects and inform the contributors that the project isn't Really Discordian, yet themselves almost never contribute to any projects or offer any Discordian Works of their own as examples of Doin' It Right. They are, in essence, the ultimate Discordian back seat driver. (Note that some are sometimes productive as well as being disruptive).

Really Real Discordians tend to lump together in large groups of typically diverse and quarrelsome individuals, accusing them of being "Greyface", "Cabbages", "Sheep", "Pinealists", or "Really Real Discordians". Really Real Discordians often confuse "disagreement" with "not getting it", and spend lots of time describing how to be a "Good Discordian", as if there's some system to master.

Occasionally a Really Real Discordian will determine that other Discordians that they find disagreeable are part of a "Hivemind", engaging in "Groupthink" under the thrall of a "Leader". The "Leader" is usually (mis)identified as the most vocal or controversial member of the group, who may in fact not be well-liked in the group, but who is outspoken and/or offensive enough to become the target of the Really Real Discordian's wrath when the Bad Discordians reject their offers to show them how to become Really Real Discordians. They may then spend a great deal of time and energy trying to dethrone the "Leader", which is pretty funny when you think about it.

Even though they seem to violate the Acapulco Rule, Really Real Discordians aren't necessarily Bad Discordians. They serve a valuable purpose: they're bothersome and critical, and renew other Discordians' interest in producing new projects (or completing those ones they said they were going to do, like, a year ago, but never Got Around To)... if only to avoid feeling to themselves like a Really Real Discordian as well. With the right mix of gravitas and absurdity of claim, they are also hilarious.

The best way to summon a Really Real Discordian, other than a d20 cast with a save of 23 or lower, is to spew out obscenties while chucking golden, delicious apples. Occasionally, the panties-on-the-head trick may be used.


  • [1]IANAR
  • [2]Ambassador Klok Kaos
  • [3]Reverend Loveshade
  • [4]The Lamanite


"Just a thought but (this article Really Real Discordians) only works if (Xxxxx.com) is the be all and end all of Discordianism. There seems to be a lot of this going on lately. By trying to appropriate Wikia and such and flood them with local in-jokes and sub-cultural memes you are actually doing EXACTLY the same as the Really Realers you see lurking under every bed. Personally I get pretty pissed off when people tell me how to be a Discordian No Matter Who They Are. I don't recall anyone ever suggesting that TFYS actually means Think Like I Do. Delightful Ironies ITT." -- MMIX (June 07, 2009, at 09:22:05 am)

"I am everything they said I was." -- Ambassador KLOK KAOS (August 23, 2011, 06:12:48 am)

"In keeping with my self-centered image, I have to point out that Discordipedia currently lists me as one of four people who claims to be a “really real Discordian”, and that I had some sort of 'extended wikiturfing battle' on Wikipedia. I don’t recall either one of those, but so often people remember me saying and doing things I know nothing about, so that’s not surprising. In fact, by now I think it’s tradition." -- Reverend Loveshade (January 15, 2010 at 9:11 pm)

"But opinions should still be based on some amount of evidence." -- IANAR (June 11, 2008, at 02:58:13 am)

"Reality is the original Rorschach." -- Principia Discordia (pg. 50)

See also[]

Types of Discordians

Types of Discordians include