Discordian Wiki

Forbidden Knowledge[]

Believe it or not, there are many Secrets of the Universe that the powers that be (e.g. The Illuminati, The Freemessin's, The President of the United States of America, British Intelligence, God Almighty, etc.) have decided it is in your (our? (their?)) best interests that you not be privy to.

Reasons for this include: it would upset the balance of power, the immaturity of the average human, their implicit guilt.

Just think, if the average human were aware of the nigh god-like power that has always been at their fingertips, nobody would get any work done and spend all of their time lazing about the house pretending to be inspired musicians, smoking dope, and trying to fuck everything that moves (actually their is some sense to this argument...)

There is also the small matter that any old schmuck could go and Immanentize the eschaton on a whim if they happened to have a bad day (e.g. quit their job, the dog died, their girlfriend ran off with the pool boy and the dog went with em, etc.)

Yes, for ALL our sakes, it's best if you remain in the dark.

Now run along and pretend you didn't read any of this. There's a good chap.