FANDOM


The Revengerists (NOW Gluten-FREE!®©™) is the consortium of fighters of crime and evil, they are globetrotting superpowered adventurers and benevolent protectors of all things awesome, (and even some mundane stuff for when they get bored). They have been in operations for years and are there whenever the world or anyone else is in trouble. They have participated in many fictitional events from the super insignificant to world changing.

Each person on the team is an "Awesome," a state of being either inborn (a 'Natch Awesome') or attained through selfless, courageous, difficult and kickass years of hard work and deeds. All Revengerists are Awesomes, but not all Awesomes are Revengerists.

They keep to the shadows in order to most effectively kick the crotches of those they deserve, shunning public lime lights and thus keeping their secrets. A method so super-effective, it has since been named 'Revenging'.

The team is famous for its battle slogan "If we can't save you, you're fucked!" which would appear in telephone books, bus stand ads and late late late night radio spots, with no indication of what the service was for. The team has featured humans, mutants, vikings, gods, aliens, robots, Discordians, and even former villains.

Their first adventures were set on the mythical hypothetical Norse plane known as Mÿspæœ-Gröüpen, set in the future year(s) of two-thousand-ought-seven to two-thousand-ought-nine. A rag-tag team with humble beginnings, The Revengerists (consortium of stuff) was soon to become the premiere exclusive club for superpowered individuals (or: Awesomes ) the world over. By two-thousand-ought-ten, despite its rigid restrictions against normal humans (or: Not-so-awesomes), the team had expanded to many chapters spanning the globe. Their combined efforts and brilliantly coordinated movements allowed them to stave off the would-be apocalypse of two-thousand-ought-twelve, thus beginning their now-ancient and sacred annual Company Picnic and Pig Roast tradition.

Even though they had been in existence for many years prior (or had time traveled or something), this was the first public declaration of their existence in some meager form, as they were seeking to recruit new members to help them prepare and fight in the Great LEGO™ War or two-thousand-ought-eight. Their subversive street marketing campaign had netted them few results, and so turned to the new science-fiction technology of the in-ter-net:

If you are: an ingenius inventor of advanced weapons technology, an extraterrestrial with powers far beyond those of Earthly mortals, really good at math, a diety or demi-god of ancient myth, a living symbol of some otherwise abstract belief, rather skilled in some regard, a sorcerer supreme, a hybrid human posessing incredible primal skills of hunting and tracking, invulnerable to damage, a mystical monster including but not limited to dragons, encumbered with lots of money, an evolutionary or even toxic mutant, an alchemist, able to regenerate at impressive rates, can induce radiation, in part or whole sentient robot, commander of legions of animals, underground denizens, or the dead, you yourself are undead, or can rejuvenate teammates from the dead, a hideous beast with immense strength, a victim of cosmic happenstance and science gone horribly wrong, or a girl, then the REVENGERISTS (consortium of stuff) is the place for you! We'll start you in our unpaid internship program, where we'll show you the ins and outs of crime-fighting and super-advanced macro-philantropy. Then you'll move on to our Accelerated program where you'll pad out that resume and do some good for mankind in the process! Learn how to control those devastating outbursts capable of leveling entire neighborhoods! Get a free t-shirt!*
*High school diploma or GED is a must, current enrollment in a university or instituion is not a prerequisite, t-shirts may be on back order for several millenia whilst interdimensional shadow beings are at large, some rules and conditions may apply, not responsible for injurious fate resulting from dismemberment, immolation, suffocation, combustion, implosion, explosion, corrosion, deatomization, viral infection, squishing or perhaps squooshing, zombification, sudden blood loss, banishment to nether-realms, and/or indigestion, not valid with any other offer in Utah, while supplies last.

Their resident cybermage, and scribe of this article, is Doktor Rev. Julius "Der Kirche" Kirchmannbaumschwein, Pope.

Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.